tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post3407606354047500407..comments2023-08-05T07:19:13.900-07:00Comments on Missing Maxie: ConversationsAbby Levisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15748394086960661826noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post-11992732673074430082012-01-27T13:00:17.406-08:002012-01-27T13:00:17.406-08:00I just watched the video and it was so on the mone...I just watched the video and it was so on the money with how people try to talk to you after your child dies. They say everything that they think is the right thing to say, but always say something totally stupid or insensitive instead. They do not want to face the fact that our children are, in fact, dead...but what they do not realize is that we have to face that fact every moment of every day of our lives and awkward silence or conversations do nothing but emphasize that point.<br /><br />Some days I want to bring Colin's urn into the office and place it on the end of my desk. People would have to see it, see the fact that my son is dead and his remains are in there, and then they would have to deal with the urn and his death in order to deal with me. I know it is a bit morbid and twisted, but at least people would have to confront their own issues before having to deal with me.Steven Stuartnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post-18657589221358605722012-01-26T14:36:42.024-08:002012-01-26T14:36:42.024-08:00That video is surreal--but truly does show how muc...That video is surreal--but truly does show how much of a struggle it must be to have to be "out there" in the world after losing Max, and how awful and strange people behave. Thank you for sharing. xoKate Spitsernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post-56559307629787601432012-01-25T20:39:10.069-08:002012-01-25T20:39:10.069-08:00I laughed when I watched this video. I have had th...I laughed when I watched this video. I have had these conversations. As for the charity events and such, I would love to do something. I've come up with ideas but so far I have been too depressed and/or sick to get motivated to do much, even in the planning parts of it. I haven't come up with an idea, either, regarding what the money could be used for. It took us about 9 months to come up with the money to buy Toby's headstone. Anything beyond that feels overwhelming...but I want to do it.Rebecca Patrick-Howardhttp://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=510492805noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post-23490964621811179192012-01-25T19:30:24.298-08:002012-01-25T19:30:24.298-08:00I have followed your blog for a while. We've ...I have followed your blog for a while. We've never met, but Maxie's smile is so beautiful, that I come back regularly. He is not forgotten, not by a long shot.<br /><br />Reading the post today, I realize that in the past I have probably said the wrong thing. For that, I am sorry. I care, I was trying, I just don't always know the right words.Ckirscht01noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post-12972126374731477102012-01-25T16:49:26.671-08:002012-01-25T16:49:26.671-08:00Thanks for posting that video. It is so real, but...Thanks for posting that video. It is so real, but surreal, just like those conversations. I kept running a tally in my mind, “yep heard that…yeah I have heard that more than once…”. My “favorite” was God sending a replacement. That makes my toes curl. I remember one of my sister’s friends telling me at Luke’s service, “you are so strong, I just couldn’t handle it”. I literally had to walk away from her before I started punching.Katie (LukeGrantsMom)noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post-68106787682660540842012-01-25T10:50:18.476-08:002012-01-25T10:50:18.476-08:00It still boggles my mind that people say those sor...It still boggles my mind that people say those sorts of things to you guys and to other grieving parents. I am so sorry that in the midst of this unspeakable tragedy you find yourselves having to deal with this kind of insensitivity and hurtfulness. Hopefully this post will help people to understand what these conversations and communications feel like to a grieving parent. Hopefully it will help people to pause and think about how to communicate with sensitivity and thought. Again, I am so, so sorry that you find yourself having to post this. It is so tragic and unfair that you and Ted have to chart these waters. And, it is beyond tragic and unfair that Maxie is not here with his Mommy and Daddy. xoJessicanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-823549861851853736.post-23670968878843229722012-01-25T10:17:22.986-08:002012-01-25T10:17:22.986-08:00Oh wow, that is a strange video but i totally get ...Oh wow, that is a strange video but i totally get why you shared it. It seems to illustrate some of those yucky conversations you have been having to have over the past 6 months. Thank you for posting it, Abby, and for continuing to be truthful. I'm am so sorry that you have to go through this. It's so horribly unjust to you and Ted...and to sweet Max, who should still be here with you.Amy Rnoreply@blogger.com