Off again

Saying goodbye to Mo just now sucked. He's gotten to the age where he knows that if I'm walking out the door with a suitcase, I'm going away for a while. All morning he was clingy - he's always clingy - but this was extreme. I feel clingy too.  His new nanny (more on that later) wanted to sit him down for breakfast and I found myself asking her to please give us more time. Leaving him is painful. And, it brings up so much of my missing Maxie. Living without Mo and Myla for the next ten days will be so hard. Living without Max for the rest of my life isn't even doable. 

And, honestly, I can barely stand listening to parents get all weepy about their kid that is going to camp for a week or away to school. In my estimation - those parents are LUCKY! Their kid will come back or they will go visit - the dramatics are wasted on me. But I can remember being at a wedding away from Maxie for a long weekend, and I couldn't concentrate on anything. I just needed to be back with him. And here I am, sitting in my taxi cab, getting weepy over leaving Mo and Myla for ten days. Sometimes I want to slap myself.

I had such a good time in Israel in February.  The experience actually brought back a huge piece of my old self. I am hoping that this trip will be similar (or totally different but with a similar outcome). I'll miss my family - but they'll most likely be here when I get back. 

Off to the Holy Land! Hoping this cease-fire lasts and that we can just enjoy the week!!!

1 comment

Seeing Each Day said...

I hope the flight goes ok. You are always so balanced (and intelligent) in what you write. I imagine it would have indeed sucked to walk out the door from Mo and Myla. I hope for the following (I) that your time abroad has you safe, (ii) that it goes quickly so you can return to your home and give cuddles to myla, mo and Ted and your pets. And (iii) that you get those moments, however fleeting, to feel that old self. Renee