Four

If you were to ask Mo how old he was today, he'd say four. I'm not sure why, since he isn't even three yet. But, people keep asking him - and he keeps saying four.

People keep laughing and asking me how it is to have three children and am I going to try for four. I rarely correct them and say "I already have four", because when I do they feel bad. Of course, the question makes me feel bad - and so does playing along with the suggestion that Mo, Myla and Macie make up the entirety of my clan of kids. 

This July will make four years since our worlds fell apart. FOUR YEARS. Impossible to imagine. There are still broken pieces everywhere I look as if the devastation JUST happened. Four years sounds like a lot. It's nothing.

Four. He should be four. He should be four.