My dream

Sunday, June 3, 2012

I had the most vivid dream the other morning, just before waking up.  I have had similar ones in the past so I apologize if this is repetitive.  Baby M was finally here.  He was born and already about 6 months old.  He was so cute.  He looked so much like Maxie.  I couldn't stop staring into his eyes.  They were crystal blue.  I could see Maxie was in there somewhere.  He couldn't speak, but he kept promising me with his eyes that he wouldn't die.  "I won't leave you", he seemed to be saying.  It felt so good to hold him in my arms, to rub his little back while he rested on my shoulder, and to feel his little face pressed against my chest while cuddling.  I felt almost whole again but at the same time, still missing Max so much.  I could have stayed there forever.  It was so perfect.  I was so happy and still so sad at the same time.  That is probably how I will always feel too.  That is the best it will get if we are really, really lucky.  If we are really lucky, we will have a beautiful life with Baby M...always missing our little monkey baby Maxie.  Oh Lord!  Please let us be that lucky!


4 comments:

Bianca said...

I am wishing with everything that this dream is a prophecy and that you have a long life of happiness with baby M to balance some of the sadness that will always be in your heart

Susan Ireland said...

My vote is for prophetic qualities too x

greg said...

Hope and believe this dream will come true. Cannot wait to meet the little guy.

robyn said...

i have faith that this dream will come true.

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