Over it....

Thursday, August 25, 2011

What is your worst fear?  The thing that, if it happened, would ruin your life?  Just the very idea of this thing happening is too much to even think about.  It will never happen to you so you don't need to think about it.  It happened to me!  Somehow I am still struggling with people who think that I need to move on. I hope this will be the last time that I write about this.  Really.  If it makes you happy to know, I am seeing a grief counselor, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker.  She has an office, next to a hospital.  She works with the families of terminally ill children.  She knows that what I am feeling is "normal" for someone who has been through what I have been through.  Other people who have been where I have been ASSURE me that the advice of "getting over it" or "moving forward" is well meaning but that I should ignore it as best I can because they do not know.  You all do not know.  Understand me.  Believe me.  You think you know and you think you are trying to give me advice that is in my best interest.  YOU DO NOT KNOW.  Anyone who has been as unfortunate as us to actually know, would never give this advice.  I am not responding to it anymore.  I will not let it upset me more than I am already upset.  It is too much.

2 comments:

Mike said...

I am really surprised that anyone would tell you to get over it. Grief is not a choice.

Rebecca said...

Girl, I feel like writing a book on the stupid things that people say when you lose a child. "At least he was an infant so you didn't have the chance to get too close to him." "Are you STILL crying?" (After two weeks.) "At least you can get some sleep now!" "I know EXACTLY how you feel. I once lost a grandma/uncle/great-aunt/hamster." Even the well-meaning ones can be just as bad. Like my friend who asked if I wanted to meet and talk to her sister because she'd had a miscarriage at 6 weeks and it had "really upset her."

Blog Design by Nudge Media Design | Powered by Blogger