My Parenting "Style"

I am kind of a different mommy to Mo than I was to Max.  With Max I really tried to do everything perfect.  I followed every recommendation.  By this age (6 months), Max was sleep trained - sleeping through the night.  He had regularly scheduled naps - 7:30 am, 10 am, 3 pm.  I never put the television on while he was awake in the room.  I carried him everywhere, even just around the house, in a carrier (because I had read that carried babies are healthier)  I made all of his food. Before he slept through the night, I regularly changed his diaper every time he woke up.  I read and sang to him every night.  I practiced signing and infant massage with him too.  I read books and books and books about babies first year of life, organic baby cook books, theories on parenting.

I don't really do all of this stuff with Mo.  He still wakes up throughout the night.  He naps whenever he gets tired - there is no schedule.  I watch television while he is awake. I sometimes even put on shows for him.  It's not on all of the time or anything but I am not at all concerned with his baby screen time.  I don't carry him all over.  I make good use of swings and play centers and bouncy/Bumbo seats.  I am making all of his food so far because I like it and because my mother in law got us the most awesome Cuisinart baby food maker, but as soon as it becomes a chore, I will buy baby food.  I don't change Mo's diaper through the night.  I put an overnight diaper on him and hope it doesn't explode.  I read and sing to him when I feel like it, but it isn't every night.  Sometimes I sign "I love you" - but that's about it.  I don't read about parenting at all.  I just do whatever I feel like doing.

On the surface, I am a different mommy to Mo than I was to Max - but I love him just as much - with every fiber in my being.  I am obsessed with every hair on his head, with every smile, every sound, his finger sucking, his chubby thighs, and every THING about him.  I just don't sweat the small stuff anymore.  My goal is to keep him happy and alive.  That's pretty much it.  That's all that really matters.  People tell me that is what happens with a second child anyway....but, this is different.  I have a perspective that most second mommies don't have.  I KNOW that none of it matters and none of it is going to keep my baby alive.  Mo is just as happy, just as smart, just as funny as Maxie was.

1 comment

Jayden's Mommy said...

I totally understand that feeling. Im a different mom today the rules are not the same. The truth is that there is no guarantees. And i will follow your advice and try to just enjoy Kyle now. Thanks Abby.