Being a better friend

I feel guilty that I haven't been a great friend to anyone this past year and a half.  I really haven't.  I have had friends come visit me and later Ted asks me how their kids are, how their husbands are....and I don't know.  Like, I haven't even asked.  I've been so lost in my own sorrow that sometimes I can't see outside of it.  And, in turn, I haven't been a very good friend...and I am so sorry.  And, in the last year and a half, so many people have been so wonderful to us.  They have listened and comforted us.  They have remembered Maxie with us and celebrated Mo.  They have sent cards and gifts and food.  They have read my blog and left comments and voicemails and sent emails and texts.

I get so riled up about the disappointing people - of whom there are probably less than ten.  There are probably five times that number (or more) of really wonderful people - REALLY wonderful people in our lives.  I want to work on being a better friend.  It is important to me.  I am sorry that I haven't been a better friend.  Truly.  I hope you can understand.

And speaking of the wonderful people in our lives:

*A few weeks ago, I wrote about the friend of my friend who lost her baby.  So many of you contacted me to ask me how you could make a donation to help this family with their funeral costs.  Many of you tried to make donations but couldn't.  I just wanted to thank you first of all - because you are kind and generous and wonderful people.  You are!  And, also to let you know those of you who weren't able to make a donation that the reason is because they closed the donation page once they had raised enough money.  It was so beautiful of you to help and to offer your help.


Jayden's Mommy said...

You are a great friend Abby. The fact that you share your journey there is a lot like us (ME) that find comfort in knowing that Im not crazy for feeling like I feel after loosing our son. No one really understands unless they gone thru this horrible journey. And you have given me the best advice to just try to survive this life without my baby. Lots of love to you and your family.


Rebecca Patrick-Howard said...

Sometimes I think it's easier to channel our feelings into anger and disappointment and direct them at people who are here (and who probably deserve it) than it is to give in to the sadness that just gets to be too overwhelming. I have tried to let most of that anger go. In the early months, though, if I hadn't felt that anger and let it out through my blog I think I would be far worse off than I am now.