Sweet boy


Sweet boy.  I miss your face.  I love your happy disposition and your easy going air.  You brought a calm into my life that I fear might be gone.  You brought a love into my life that I have never felt before.  Sweet little boy.  I long to kiss and hug you.  I ache to curl up on the couch and cuddle with you.  Your soft cheeks against my cheeks.  I would give anything to love you again, my love.  I want to cover your face with kisses.  My heart is always breaking.  I am so lonesome.  Sweet boy, I used to feel your spirit with me and now I don't as much.  I hate being without you, but I am happy to see you in my dreams from time to time.  There is no doubt, sweet baby boy, that I will love you to eternity.  You brought out the very best in me and when you left, only the worst in me remains.  I am sorry sweet baby that I wasn't there for you that day or so many that came before.  I feel sick about it every day.  I am so sorry my sweet baby boy.  I love you to the moon and beyond, my monkey.

3 comments

Bianca said...

Oh Ab, look at that perfect and sweet little pumpkin of a boy that you created. His wise eyes, his half smile, his delicious cheeks and those little baby chub lines on his arms are all so beautiful! I ache for him to be here with you and his daddy. I ache for him not being in my life and most of all of course for him not being in your arms. The world is missing out on such a bright light and it is so awful and unfair and heartbreaking.

Kim said...

Abby, I am so, so sorry. He is beautiful, and even though you are feeling so much pain and regret, I believe in my heart that you were truly there for him every day of his life - every minute of his life - loving him, and he knew it. You may feel like you weren't there for him but you were, 100%, and he felt it.

Kathleen said...

What a precious, loving blog entry and picture of your sweet boy...cute cheeks, eyes and nose; the green grass, bright sun, puffy cloud and flying bird on the blanket; giraffe, lion and monkey on his shirt...Big Blue WON on Sunday! Sending heartfelt hugs...

Wishing sweet dreams,
Kathleen